Ambition
by Broadway Babe WA
Summary: "The Broadway community is a tight little dysfunctional family—dysfunctional because it's a family that has sex with each other." –Megan Hilty. Further description inside.
1. Chapter 1

**Well, this _was_ going to be the first Smash story, but since someone beat me to posting, it's not. B**ut we started writing this story about two weeks ago. (Note that this was _before_ we knew that the Derek/Ivy would be a real _relationship_. Sorry, Megan Hilty…)**. this called _Ambition_, which you probably know already, and it pretty much spells out the story. As Megan Hilty put it, Ivy Lynn is the embodiment of ambition, and she'll do just about anything to get what she wants.  
><strong>

**So to explain, (considering we had such an unclear summary in the description) Ivy, driven by her ambition, seduces Derek for Marilyn. Her drive and determination has taken her to the point past her own control, having pretty much taken over her mind, and made her willing to do anything and everything just for the role of Marilyn. She hopes to get the lead by sleeping with the Derek, finds herself pregnant instead. **

**Note: This takes place just at that part where she collapses in that promo after the episode. Oh, and Ivy's mother will make small appearances here and there, as she's very significant to how Ivy behaves as in sleeping with directors. (Her mom was always so pushy and unsatisfied with Ivy that she embedded that competitive edge into her that makes her so determined.) I also know that her mother is named Leigh Conroy, and she will be played by Bernadette Peters. Yay!**

**DISCLAIMER: SMASH is property of Steven Spielberg and NBC. If it were mine, Kristin Chenoweth would've also been on my guest star list among other ideas in my constantly churning mind. I'd also probably end up torturing the poor characters, because I have a tendency to do that unintentionally**

* * *

><p>"<em>The Broadway community is a tight little dysfunctional family—dysfunctional because it's a family that has sex with each other."<em>

~Megan Hilty

_Two Months Ago,_

_Derek's Apartment…_

Ivy Lynn's POV

There's way too much debate about casting me or Karen… what makes them think Karen could do this anyways? She doesn't even have any experience on the stage, so how is there even a question about it? Broadway needs experience, and I have it. True, she's got talent, but that shouldn't automatically qualify her to play the part. Besides, it's _Marilyn Monroe_. She's too lanky.

Since I'm getting sick of waiting to find out if I've lost my best shot for a lead or not, I've decided to take the matter into my own hands. Before workshops today, I put on my tight, gray leopard print dress and put on some extra makeup. I found Derek and told him that I to talk to him about Marilyn, and playing the lead. He told me to meet him at his apartment after workshops.

I already know what he's implying, and I know Derek's known to be a womanizer, but that doesn't make any difference to me. I've always been treated the same way by men, so his reaction to me isn't new, and I've learned not to let it bother me. If I do it, he might give me the lead, so it'll be worth it. Anyways, there's only so many ways to get a lead after ten years in the ensemble, and at this point I'll do everything it takes to get it.

Now I'm sitting on the couch next to Derek in his apartment. I've given him a few drinks since we got here and I have the feeling this is going to work out just as I had hoped. It's been silent for the last few minutes, but I can't think of what to say.

"What are you thinking about?" Derek asks, breaking the silence and looking at me.

"Why are you asking?"

"You said you wanted to talk about you getting the lead," he says.

"Yeah…" I say, taking a sip from a glass of wine. "Why?"

"I'm pretty sure you're gonna get it" Derek says. I smile. "Anything else you want to talk about?"

"Not really," I say, handing him another drink.

He takes it, "Thanks."

I smile, moving closer to him.

Derek smiles. "Are you liking the play?" he asks.

"Yeah," I say, still grinning at him.

He wraps his arm around me as I scoot closer. Before I know it, he's leading me upstairs and soon enough I'm in his bedroom, his mouth on mine, just as I had planned.

_Now,_

_Marilyn the Musical…_

Tom Levitt's POV

Ivy seems out of it today, I tried to get her to take it easy but she wouldn't. I'm looking down at my notes when I hear a loud crash, like someone's fallen. Sure enough, she's laying on the floor, and it looks like she's fainted.

They cut off the music and the guy who dropped her is kneeling down by her, "Move," I tell him, and he quickly gets out of the way.

I gently check her pulse and thankfully it's still strong. I hear one of the other dancers say they've called an ambulance. "Ivy…" I say, brushing the hair from her face.

She doesn't really move much so I call her name again, and she starts stirring. The paramedics come in and help me get her up on the gurney. She starts waking up, "Tom?"

"It's okay, you fainted and we're gonna take you to the hospital just to check things out…" I tell her.

Once we get to the hospital they have everything stabilized and from what I can tell she's comfortable. They get her situated in a room and take some blood, and one of the nurses lets us know that the doctor will be in once the results come back.

About half an hour later, the doctor comes in, and he smiles at Ivy, "hey Ivy… how're you feeling?"

"Fine now, thanks…" she calmly says.

"Alright. We did some blood work and it's showing that you're pregnant," he explains. This must be news to her too, she looks shocked.

"What?" she asks.

"We ran it a few times, but that's what it's showing…" he further explains.

"It has to be wrong… I made all the precautions," she protests, trying to hide that she's upset.

"We can do an ultrasound but the blood work is pretty accurate…" the man tells her.

She just sighs, she seems disappointed. I know this will drastically change her chances of getting the lead in Marilyn.

"Just relax, I'll send a nurse in to start your ultrasound soon…" he says and leaves the room.

Ivy sighs and rests her head back on the pillow.

"If you don't mind me asking, do you know who the father is?" I ask her, hopefully she'll answer.

"Yeah, he won't be interested," she sadly says.

"How do you know that?"

"He's not exactly the fatherly type… to put it lightly," she explains.

I just sigh, "Do I know him?" I'm trying to think of who it could be but no one's really sticking out at me.

"Yeah," she quietly says.

"Is it someone from Marilyn?" I ask. I really hope it isn't Derek.

"Right again…" she replies, hanging her head.

"I won't say anything just yet, you can tell me." I want her to know that I'm gonna support her with this.

"Derek…" she quietly mumbles.

"Wow. I hate to say that you're right about him not being fatherly."

"Yeah," she agrees.

"Are you gonna tell your mom?" I ask. Ivy and her mom have never really seen eye to eye and I'm not sure this pregnancy isn't going to help that at all.

"I think I'll let that wait a while before she has to know," she says.

"Alright. But you should tell her," her family needs to know about this, even though she doesn't want them to.

"I don't think she needs to know right now," she protests.

"Why not?" I ask her, hoping to get an answer.

"She gives me enough crap already about always being in the ensemble. Now I'll never be Marilyn."

I squeeze her hand, "Ya know you're gonna have to tell Derek regardless of if you tell your mom."

"Why should he know? He'll just keep doing what he always does," she asks.

"What if we cast you? It won't be good for the baby if you're always performing," I explain.

"I need this part, Tom…" she whimpers.

"I know you need this part, but we've gotta think about what's happening," I remind her.

She just sighs, I can tell she's upset and disappointed, and probably scared too.

"Let's just talk to Derek. You never know, he might want to help you with the baby." There's always a chance of this happening, but it's very slim.

"Like that's ever gonna happen. He hates everything so I don't think a baby is gonna make a difference," she tells me.

I sigh, "Yeah… I'm sorry. Your mom might come around if she knows about the baby. After all, it is her grandkid…"

"I still think telling her will have to wait a while, just don't tell anyone right now, I need time to work this out," she says, starting to sound stressed.

"Alright. I just worry about letting you keep working on Marilyn because of the baby," I tell her.

"I'll be fine…" she tells me.

"Alright, but if you start feeling like you can't do it, you can tell me," I remind her, she needs to start taking it easy more often.

"Okay" she sighs, and closes her eyes.

I can't believe this is happening to her, she finally had a chance at this part and the man who's supposed to give it to her took it away. It's going to put too much stress on her and it won't be good for the baby. She needs her rest and has to eat more than a small piece of fruit or a sandwich.

She seems really disappointed about this, but we still have to tell Derek. I'm worried about how he's going to react since it is his baby. I have a feeling he's going to do something horrible to her, I just don't know what.

She might try to tell everybody that it's mine. But the problem is, I'm gay. She knows I'll help her through all this and that makes sense to want to tell people that it's mine when I'm actually around her and the baby.

_Ivy's Studio Apartment…_

Ivy's POV

How could this have happened? I'm an actress, what am I supposed to do with a baby? I can't just have it and actually get a lead on Broadway. Come to think of it, I can't just have it and get anything on Broadway. Then what would I do for money? I already live in a semi-small studio apartment somewhere a ways off Broadway. Okay, I shouldn't start panicking now. I should probably think this out…

I take a deep breath and start to organize my thoughts.

I have three options here, I can keep the baby, I could give it to someone else, or I could have an abortion. I obviously can't keep it, I'm a single ensemble actress that makes barely enough to live in a studio apartment by myself. What could I possibly do with a baby? The easiest choice would obviously be the abortion, then no one would have to know and I could pretend it never happened. I could get the part of Marilyn and just go on with my life.

But I don't know if I wanna have to do that.

The last choice would be to have it, but to just give it away. I could still keep up with my Broadway career and I wouldn't have to take care of raising a baby by myself either, but I would have to stop for a few months… I don't know if I can do that. I don't know if I want to deal with the whole pregnancy thing either… but there are all kinds of crazy mistakes they can make while doing an abortion that could actually really mess things up which would probably effect how well I can dance.

So I guess the abortion is out… which takes me back to either keeping it or letting someone adopt it. I still don't really think I can keep it, I'd be a single mom in New York City, and I barley even make enough to support myself. I could've made more money if I had tried to develop skills in other areas than singing or dancing, but the stage is all I've trained for my entire life. I never had time to learn anything else.

I also wouldn't have time to raise a baby while I'm an actress, even if I'm in the ensemble. The time it takes to be onstage is demanding, and even if I stayed in the same show and only performed at night like some people, that's the time I'd have to be around after the kid's in school to actually see it. It would just never work…

I think my mind is going to explode… this is too much to think about all at once. I wish I could get a drink or something… in the end I find myself taking a quick trip to Little Italy for some Italian ice which probably won't help since it causes brain freezes. Originally I was just going to get some ice cream, but Italian ice sounded better.

As I sit on the subway on the way back home, still eating the Italian ice, I remember the time Julia came in late when I was working on that first Marilyn song with Tom. She said she was late because a social worker had to look over her and her husband's birth certificates to get an adoption through. I'd almost forgotten, Julia wants a baby.

When I get back to my apartment I get onto my computer and start looking into if I can just give her the baby and if there's anything I'd have to do. Agh why do I have to do all this stuff? I'd have to find an attorney and be checked by a psychologist. Do they think I'd be insane for not keeping a baby or something? Maybe it would just be easier to keep it, then I don't have to do all this legal crap… ugh but then I'd be a single mom and a failing Broadway actress and I live in a tiny studio apartment!

In the end I just give up on reading all the legal crap. My brain is blowing up from reading all of this and I'm just over thinking everything at this point…

I sigh, picking up the phone. I dial Julia's number and wait as it rings…

* * *

><p><strong>Well, here's chapter one! What do ya think so far? The next chapter is ready but I'm probably gonna wait a week to post, so keep your eyes peeled! <strong>

**Also, could you please just review? I honestly need your guys opinion to see what you think. We also arrived at this idea since Ivy threw up in the pilot and in that promo she just kinda fell on that guy while singing then more recently she looked really troubled after talking to Tom who said she was "born to do this". We figured there was something sketchy going on with Ivy and we arrived at either pregnancy or bulimia so yeah… we decided to do this hehe. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter two! I really hope y'all are enjoying this because we really are trying to write a good story. Since people asked, here's chapter two! Tell your friends! (Jk, but please, spread this story. I would really appreciate it.)  
><strong>

* * *

><p><em>Julia's Apartment<em>

Julia's POV

Ivy fell during rehearsals and had to go to the hospital. We let Karen practice in her place while she was gone. I'm not too sure what's wrong with her but she's been looking exhausted and paler than usual lately.

I get home and not too long after that my phone starts ringing. Oh good, It's Ivy.

"Hey…" I say to her.

"Hey, I need you to do me a huge favor," she says, sounding tired and upset.

I start thinking of what she could want me to do but I want to know if she's okay. "First, I want you to tell me what the doctor said." She just sighs, I can tell she's disappointed and scared. "What's's wrong?" I ask her.

"They said I'm pregnant," she quietly mumbles. I had a feeling that was possible when she started looking so exhausted and pale. Her and Derek haven't been on good terms lately so I'm not sure if he knows about this.

"Oh Ivy, how far along are you?" this is going to be really hard on her because I know she can't perform while she's pregnant.

"I wasn't really paying attention when they said… I was trying to figure out what to do about Marilyn," she says, trying to hold back tears.

"Well, we're gonna have to tell Derek." He has to know, there are some things Ivy just won't be able to do anymore.

"Can it wait?" she asks, sounding scared and I think she's crying a little.

"How long were you planning on waiting?" I ask, hopefully not until she starts showing or until the baby's born.

"I was hoping till he'd just notice but I don't think that would work" she sadly says.

"No, it won't. I hate to ask, but do you know the father?" if it's somebody that's willing to help her, he needs to know. But part of me wants to think that it might be Derek.

"Yeah, but I don't really wanna talk about that right now," she sighs.

"Alright. Now, what did you wanna ask me?" I say to her.

"Weren't you and your husband interested in an adoption?" she hesitantly asks, her voice shaking.

"Yeah," I reply, smiling just a little.

"They say it's a long process that could take years until you get a kid… it works faster when you know who you're adopting from" she quickly says, I knew this already though, it's what we were told by the people at the adoption agency.

"You want me to adopt your baby?" I ask, a little surprised she's doing this. But then again, it makes sense. She knows I would give the baby a good home, and a family. Ivy's just so busy right now with her career, she barely takes time to do things to take care of herself.

"If you're interested. It could help both of us…" she begs.

I sigh, "I'll talk to my husband. But you are going to take it easy for a few days…"

"Alright, fine," she says, sounding a little annoyed.

"Just take tomorrow off and you can come back after that if you're feeling up to it…" I suggest.

"Okay. bye Julia…" she sighs, and hangs up.

_Marilyn the Musical_

Karen's POV

I'm sitting in front of the mirror in the dressing room and Ivy comes in. "Hey… feeling better?" I ask her, smiling.

"Yeah, thanks…" she says, putting her bag down.

"What'd the doctor say?" I ask, she fainted and everybody was worried because she seemed like she was sick with something.

"I'm pregnant. Don't tell anyone else yet, okay…" she quietly says. Oh god, this is going to cause a lot of drama.

"I won't. How far along?" I ask. it can't be too much because she's been fine before this.

"I don't really remember what they said…"

"How do you not remember that?" I nearly scream, most women remember how far along they are when they're pregnant.

"I was thinking about what I'm gonna do about playing Marilyn!" she exclaims. I guess that's believable.

I sigh, "Ask Tom. He was at the hospital with you. He probably remembers."

"Yeah, he probably does," She says. Tom went with her when she was in the ambulance. Which was probably a good thing because if he didn't she probably would have been back up here yesterday.

"What about your mom? Does she know?" I ask.

"I haven't told her yet. I'm probably not keeping it," she says. I had a feeling she wouldn't keep it. She's not in the right spot to have a kid, heck, even I couldn't have a kid right now.

"What about Derek? He's gotta know" I say, she can't be doing all this dancing with a baby. It's not good.

"I'm just trying to keep it kinda quiet while I'm working it out," she says.

"How long is that gonna be?" I ask her.

"Well depending on what they say in the next few days, I might know who's taking the baby by the end of the week," she tells me.

"So you're giving it up for adoption then?" I ask, I have a feeling it's gonna be Julia. She's been talking about adopting for a while now.

"Yeah, I can't keep it by myself." She sighs.

"So the father is out of the picture?" I ask, I'm not too sure how she's gonna react to this one.

"Yeah," she sadly says.

"Do you know him?" I ask, not too sure who it could be.

"Yeah. He's in this show."

"So that means I know him," I say, trying to think of the guys that are in this. Tom is gay, so it probably isn't him, and I'm not so sure Ivy would sleep with Ellis. It could be one of the dancers, or Derek.

She's quiet. I knew she wouldn't tell me after she said he was in the show. "I won't tell anybody," I offer.

She sighs, "Alright. it's Derek."

"Seriously?" I exclaim. I didn't know they were sleeping together.

"Shhh! We don't need the whole theater hearing!" she loudly whispers.

"Okay, okay. I promise I won't say a word," I quietly tell her.

"Thanks," she says, turning to look in the mirror to do her hair.

Ivy's POV

Later, I'm working on another new number with the ensemble guys when I see Derek walking over, and he looks really pissed… never mind, he almost always looks pissed.

"IVY!" he yells as he gets over to where I am. "We need to talk! NOW"

"Alright, I'm coming…" I say, _jeez_…

"Who the hell knocked you up?" he demands as soon as we're aside.

"Who told you?" How does he know? I only told two people and then Tom was there when I was at the hospital. But asked Karen to keep it a secret so did Julia tell him?

"Ellis…"

"How'd he know?" The only way Ellis would know is if Tom told him, but I told Tom not to tell anyone. Is there anyone around here I can actually trust?

"He has his ways," Derek says. "What the hell were you thinking anyway?"

"What?" I ask.

"Sleeping with some guy and ruining your chances of getting a lead!" Derek yells at me.

"I wasn't just sleeping with some guy!"

"You obviously were," he says skeptically, "You're pregnant!"

"I was sleeping with YOU!" I yell at him.

"It's NOT my kid," Derek says, "You're a slut Ivy."

"I am not a slut!" I'm still yelling at him. _How could he call me a slut? It's not like I go around flirting with all the guys in the ensemble! It wouldn't even work anyways, they're mostly gay!_

"Whatever you say," Derek replies blandly, "But it CAN'T be my kid."

"You're the only one I've been sleeping with lately!" I yell.

"Yeah. But there's still no way."

"How is it possible to NOT be yours?" I really can't stop yelling at him at this point, "It's not like I go sleeping with the entire ensemble!" Again, they're mostly gay. Gay, and taken. _Am I seriously the only single person in the business? Even Karen has a boyfriend!_

"Okay. Fine. So it is mine, but I don't want anything to do with it."

That doesn't surprise me at all. I already figured I'd be doing this alone no matter what I decided to do, and Derek won't even care anyways.

"I knew you wouldn't. That's why I wasn't going to tell you!"

"We can't exactly have a fat Marilyn!" Derek snaps, and I know this means I'm fired. Great, so I lost my job in the process of getting it.

"I know that! Just give Karen the part!" I yell back.

He sighs. "Fine. Don't come crying to me when you don't have any money to raise a kid."

"I'm not keeping it."

"Alright then. One less thing I have to worry about." He's just such an ass…

"Like you were going to worry about it to begin with," I retort, still just angry at him.

"Whatever," he says, "Just go get rid of that kid"

*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*

I really need some fresh air. Usually, I love to be in the workshop rooms, hearing the music playing and the others dancing, but I haven't enjoyed it as much today. And to think that was _before_ Derek fired me. I had just been a little upset all morning when I _was_ still working on the songs. Maybe since it's been so soon since I found out I'm pregnant. Or maybe it was trying to hide it from Derek. I couldn't help but feel his eyes on me whenever I danced by him during the rehearsals.

I quickly walk down the stairs and into the cool air. It's refreshing, abet a little smelly. I'm used to the smell though, I've grown up in New York City my whole life. I take a deep breath, leaning against the wall, taking in the loud noises around me. Being a lifelong New Yorker, I always find the sounds of the hustle and bustle calming when I want to think.

But before I know it, I'm crying. I can't explain why exactly, but I can feel the hot, wet tears on my face. I just can't handle the pressure this is putting on me. Tom and Julia want me to stop performing as much, and Derek is just going to keep staying mad at me, and I don't have a chance at being Marilyn anymore. I practically fired myself when he told me _we can't have a fat Marilyn!_

Then I hear footsteps behind me. Did someone follow me? Or did they just come out for some fresh air too? I turn around and it's Tom

"Ivy?" I don't say anything. He steps closer to me, looking concerned. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing…" I say, wiping around my eyes and taking a deep breath.

"Come on now," he says, "Derek pulled you aside and now you're crying. What is it?"

"Did you tell Ellis about me?" I might as well have yelled at him. Who else could've told Ellis so Derek would know?

"Of course not," Tom says, "Remember I promised not to tell anyone when we were at the hospital."

"Ellis told Derek," I sigh, staring at the concrete under my feet.

Tom sighs. "Who else knows besides them?"

"I told Julia on the phone when I was home and I just told Karen, but that's it…"

"Do you think maybe Ellis overhead you and Karen?" Tom asks, I heard he tends to leak things out, but I didn't think he was there…

"I didn't see him," I say, trying to think about if I saw him lurking anywhere when I was talking to Karen.

"He can be sneaky sometimes…" Tom says, "Want me to take you home?" he offers, looking at me.

"No, I'll be fine…" I say, trying to force a small smile like I usually do when I'm upset, but Tom always knows that I am.

"You sure?" he asks, "I don't want you to do anything stupid cause you're upset."

"I won't do anything stupid," I tell him,_ what other stupid things are there for me to do?_ "I just need to go home… he practically fired me"

"Wait, he did what?" Tom asks, looking angry.

"He said he didn't want a fat Marilyn. Karen is Marilyn now," I tell him.

He squeezes my shoulder, "I'm sorry Ivy, I know you wanted this. But you're gonna get through this." I don't have anything to say to that. "Don't worry, it'll be okay…"

"How am I supposed to get a part now?" I ask sadly.

"Just wait until you have the baby and I'm sure something will come up."

"I just blew my only chance I'm ever gonna get at a lead," I sigh, thinking about how bad things look for my career right now.

"You don't know that…"

"This is the closest I've ever gotten to the lead. I just blew it."

"Just calm down," Tom says, "Things are gonna work out."

"I doubt it…" I reply, sighing.

"Why are you saying that?"

"I've always been in the ensemble," I tell him, "No one else has been interested except you, you know I'm trained..."

"Maybe once the baby's born I can try to help you find something," Tom tells me.

"Alright," I sigh.

He squeezes my shoulder. "Maybe one where the director doesn't ask his actresses to sleep with him, and isn't a heartless jerk," Tom says.

"Okay…"

"I dunno if this will make you feel any better, but if it were my kid I wouldn't act like I didn't want it," Tom tells me. I just sigh. It makes me feel a little better, but not much. It isn't his kid, and Tom is too gay for it to ever be his.

"I just hope the Broadway press don't hear about this…" I say. "If they do can we just pretend it's yours?" I ask. It would be so much easier if I didn't have to say it's the director's baby when he doesn't even like me…

"We'll just play that one by ear. We'll have to be careful about Ellis though," Tom says, and I know that. He's the one that told Derek…

"Yeah…" I sat, "You should probably talk to him about telling people stuff we don't want spread around."

"I'll try. Just go home and rest. If you want I'll call you later to check on you…"

"Alright…"

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter two! What do you think? Good? Bad? Yes? No? I need to know, everybody, so <em>please<em> just review! I know they say that people who write shitty stories don't deserve reviews, but I think they do so they can get the opinions they need to _improve!_ I'm not saying I think this story's shitty, but if you do, just tell me. (Preferably in a polite manner, please, don't just flame it and go _IT SUCKS!_ because that simply _is not_ helpful.) Thank you.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter three, y'all! I'm hoping you guys really like this story, 'cause it's the most I've written in a really long time. Well, that I've actually posted. I made a few dabbles but they never got my seal of approval to be posted.**

**Enjoy, peoples!**

* * *

><p><em>Marilyn the Musical…<em>

Tom's POV

After Derek yelled at Ivy the way he did it's not right. She's too upset right now for him to do things like that. It's not good for her to be all worked up, she needs to relax.

I find him in the theater back at work on another song, "DEREK!" I shout at him.

"I'm working on your new song, how am I supposed to finish it for you when people keep interrupting me?" he yells.

"It's important," I calmly tell him.

"Fine, what?" he asks, giving the dancers a water break.

"What the hell did you do to Ivy?" I ask, getting angry.

"She can't really be a part of this show while she's knocked up," He bluntly states.

"But you can't fire her without talking to Julia and I first!" I yell back, Julia and I are trying to write this, if he fires the lead, it makes things difficult.

"You still want her in this?" he screams. Just because he doesn't want anything to do with the baby, doesn't mean he should totally ignore Ivy.

"She deserves this! But what she doesn't deserve is a heartless jerk like you who knocks her up and then tells her to get rid of the baby!" I tell him, it really hurt ivy when he said those things to her.

"I don't want any part of that baby!"

"Then why'd you sleep with her? She's devastated that she won't get this lead!" I yell. The dancers have realized we're going to take a while and have started working through what they know on their own.

"She can't have this lead!" he yells.

"You screwed her over! Let her be an understudy for the next few months and then take over when she has the baby," I suggest.

"Alright, fine. But this show can't work with a pregnant Marilyn!" he snaps.

"I'm not that dumb. But do you want it to go to the press if you kick her off?" I ask him.

"Well what else are we going to do with her?" he yells.

"Keep it quiet for as long as possible, Karen needs an understudy," I suggest.

"Alright, fine. but she'll have to wait until after the baby to do anything with the show," he says.

"I know. Just stop being an ass to her, things are hard enough for her right now."

"I'm an ass to everybody," he says, correcting me.

I sigh, "Could you try to be nicer to her? Whether you like it or not she is having your kid." Now I understand why Ivy said he's not the fatherly type.

"I told you, I'm not interested in the kid. I don't want anything to do with it," he says to me.

"Whatever. You just made it really hard for me to respect you" I nearly growl at him.

"That doesn't really matter to me," he calmly says.

"Well it should matter. I'd want the people who I work with to respect me," I can't believe half of the things he's saying right now, honestly, I'm glad he doesn't want anything to do with her baby because the kid would have a sorry excuse for a father.

"I just need people to do what I say so the show won't flop." And a lot of that comes from respect and the people's willingness to work together, I'm not sure how well that'll work out.

"Yeah, okay. And by do what you say does that include sleep with you? Because that's certainly what you did to Ivy," I remind him.

"I didn't make her do anything she said she would do everything it takes to get Marilyn."

I just sigh, "So you thought it included sleeping with her? How low can you possibly get?"

"That doesn't seem to matter seeing the shows I do are successes." It should matter, especially now that the girl who was supposed to be his lead is pregnant.

"Now I know why. But this time you screwed up and got your lead pregnant."

"Well it's a good thing I had two options for the lead when this started," he says, with a smirk on his face.

"You got really lucky there. And you'll be lucky if I work with you after this" I yell, he hurt one of my really good friends, and I don't think I can work with someone who hardly cares about other people.

"I didn't want to work with you to begin with. That was all Eileen's idea," he tells me.

"You can't do anything about it now. That is, unless you want me to tell Eileen what you did," I suggest.

"She's the one that wanted me on this show," he reminds me.

"You may be right about that but does she know how heartless you really are?" I ask.

"We'll see if you tell her."

"I just might have to seeing that you nearly fired Ivy without coming to us first," I snap, that really bothers me that he'd do that without coming to anyone else trying to put this show together.

"I told you we can't cast Ivy now anyways," he calmly says.

"I know, but that doesn't stop several people from being angry with you for what you've done," I remind him.

"Right now there's just you," he says, I can tell he's thinking.

"Do you not think Ivy is angry? You took away her chance of getting a lead," I snap, I've just about had it with this man, he needs to realize what he's done and how much he's changed her life.

"I already talked to her," he tells me.

"I know that. She was crying after you did," I say, I'm not sure when she started crying. It probably wasn't until she got away from him.

"She was crying?"

"Yeah. Because of what you did," I snap.

"She can't do anything around here for us," he coolly says.

"I'm done going in circles with you," I say, waiting for him to either leave or say something else that's stupid.

"I have work to do," he mumbles. He's lucky he chooses the option to walk away.

_Ivy's Apartment…_

Ivy's POV

I'm still crying a little by the time I get home. I just lost my only job. I don't know how to do anything except perform. I won't be able to pay my rent for very long by myself and I definitely won't be able to pay for the doctors appointments I'm going to have to go to. I can probably get away with staying in the ensemble of Heaven on Earth for a while but I won't be able to perform in that once I've started showing…

I don't even know what I'm doing with the baby yet. I'm still trying to get Julia to adopt it but what if that falls through? Then what do I do? I'm afraid to put it in the system but I can't raise the baby by myself. I'm just an actress. I should probably call Julia again. Maybe she can work out what to do about Marilyn and Heaven on Earth and everything else…

I call Julia and it rings once before she picks up.

"Hey," she says.

"Hi…"

"What's up?" Julia asks, "You sound upset…"

"Derek fired me," I sigh.

"Without telling me?" Julia asks, "There's no way."

"Well I don't have a part anymore so I don't really have a job in Marilyn either…" I say. I really have no idea how I'm going to pay my rent or anything now. If I don't have Marilyn there's only Heaven on Earth which won't last long…

"Tom told me about all that. After much arguing they agreed to let you be an understudy," Julia tells me. Thank God. Now there's one less thing for me to panic over…

"Really?" I ask. It's not like I don't trust what Julia tells me, but after hearing Derek I'm still afraid he's not going to go for this…

"Yeah. Tom wouldn't let Derek just fire you without talking to us first…" Julia says. "It's gonna be okay. we're gonna help you work through this. I promise you're not gonna lose your job. I wouldn't do that to you, especially now."

"Thanks…"

"I'm talking to my husband tonight. I'll let you know what we decide," Julia says.

"Alright…"

_Julia's Apartment…_

Julia's POV

When I get home I find Frank in the living room on the couch, so I sit next to him, "Hey…"

"Hey…" he says, wrapping an arm around me.

"So are you still thinking about adopting?" I quietly ask.

"Yeah, why?" he asks.

"I may have found a baby we can adopt…" I calmly tell him, hoping he doesn't freak out when I tell him whose it is.

"Really?"

"Yeah…" I say, scooting in a little closer to him.

"How?" he calmly asks.

"Ivy…" I reply, hoping he's okay with this.

"She's pregnant?" he asks, sounding surprised.

"Yeah… sad thing is it's Derek's," I tell him. He should know who the father is.

"Really?" he asks, starting to rub my shoulder.

"Yeah. She's scared and doesn't know what else to do," I explain.

"Jeez what happened? I thought she was going to be Marilyn."

"I did too. then Derek had to ruin it for her. I'm not sure why he'd even do something like this" I say, I probably sound annoyed. Ivy was perfect for Marilyn.

"Well, he's known to be a womanizer…" Frank says, causing me to hide a laugh.

"Yeah, I know. He tried to fire her when she told him," I tell him.

"How did that go?" he asks, sounding concerned.

"She was upset, of course. But Tom and I argued to get her to stay," I explain.

"What is she doing now then? Karen is probably Marilyn now."

"She's an understudy. But Derek is still furious."

"That doesn't surprise me…" He says, still rubbing my shoulder.

"He wants nothing to do with the baby so she called me," I explain.

"You think we should adopt it?" He asks, if we did adopt, we wouldn't have to wait so long for a baby from China.

"Yeah, I really do. I want to do what I can to help Ivy," I tell him.

"She still wants to do Broadway doesn't she?"

I sigh, "Yeah, I feel like her mom won't really accept her unless she gets a lead."

"It sounds like it," he says, I can tell it concerns him that Ivy's in a rough situation.

"I feel like we need to do this for her, I'm just worried about what Derek will say," I say to him, Derek might not be too happy with me if I adopt his kid.

"Maybe you just shouldn't let him know for a while…" Frank suggests.

"We'll see about it…"

"Just try talking to Ivy first," he says, pulling me in and hugging me.

"I will. I told her I'd call her after we talked," I say, resting my head on his shoulder and letting him wrap his arms around me.

"Alright," he says, kissing the top of my head.

_Ivy's Apartment…_

Ivy's POV

I'm still sitting in my kitchen waiting for Julia to call me back. I really need her to call me so I can finally know what I'm going to do about this baby. I know I still have a job in Marilyn which makes me less worried, but I still need to know what I'm going to do with it. If her husband doesn't take it then I'm going to keep it, but it scares me to do it alone. My mom did and she turned out this crazy stage mom that forced me to do Broadway. I like performing anyways, but it wouldn't always be so stressful if she weren't on my back about it…

Finally my phone rings and I snatch it up on the first ring.

"Hey…" Julia says.

"Hi…"

"I've got some good news," Julia says, sounding happier.

"What?"

"We're gonna adopt your baby," Julia says.

I sigh, relaxing a little more. "Really?"

"Yeah, we know how much you want to be on Broadway… this will give you another chance."

"Thanks…" I say. I can't believe how relieved I feel that Julia and her husband are going to adopt the baby, but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to just start a family. I've never been in a real family so I don't really know what it's like. Maybe I will do that one day, but I just don't think I can raise this baby by myself.

"It's gonna be fine," Julia tells me, "But I still want you to think about talking to your mom."

I sigh. "Alright…"

I really don't want to tell her. I already know what she'll say. All she cares about is my career. Nothing else matters to her. She just wants me to be a Broadway star like she was. She wasn't even a star that long, it only lasted one show. She won a Tony award for doing some show then never had a real Broadway career since. Probably because of me.

"You can tell her about the adoption…" she tells me, "You never know how she'll react… just give it a try…"

"Alright." I sigh and hang up.

Well I'm glad to know that Julia and Frank are going to adopt the baby, but now I have to call my mom. I really don't think she needs to know about this, but Julia is going to keep telling me to call her until I do.

I go to my freezer and get out a pint of ice cream. I usually don't keep ice cream or anything like that in my apartment but lately I've really liked ice cream, even more I've been craving Italian ice a lot but since I have to go down to Little Italy to get it I usually just get ice cream instead. Before now if you looked in my refrigerator you would find some vegetables, some fruit, and probably some random foods that I can heat up. The freezer would usually just have some ice, some frozen food I can heat up, and maybe a frozen yogurt. Right now, though, it's filled with ice cream pints plus everything else I just mentioned.

Before I know it I've finished the entire container of ice cream. I usually never eat that much since I need to stay in shape for Broadway, but I've been a hungry a lot more lately. I finally can't put off calling my mom anymore after I had cleaned my apartment, (it's gotten pretty messy) gotten the expired frozen meals out of my freezer (there were a lot of them, I never eat at home) and sorted through about three months worth of junk mail plus a few random papers here and there. (I never really check it, once I finish a show I either go out with some friends for a while, or go straight home and crash.)

I sigh, picking up my phone. I dial my mom's number and wait until she picks up. "Ivy?"

"Hey mom…" I say.

"Hey… what's up?" she asks.

"Uhm… I'm pregnant…"

"That would be a great april fools joke, but, it's not April…" mom says, sounding a little cautious. I don't say anything. "So its true then?" she asks after a short silence.

"Yeah…"

"Was it a random one night stand where the dad doesn't even know?" she asks, sounding a little annoyed.

"No, it's my director…" I say.

"That's ridiculous," she says, sounding mad. "Why the hell would you sleep with your director?"

"He was about to give Marilyn to someone else…" I say, "He said he'd give it to me…"

"Does he know about the baby?"

"Yeah, he fired me…" I sigh.

"That's what you get."

"The writers let me keep my job so I'm the understudy," I tell her.

"You're still not the lead," mom says, sounding annoyed. "How are you going to raise a baby by yourself?"

"Julia the other writer wants to adopt it," I say.

"Whatever. You're screwing up your only chance to get a lead."

I knew she was going to say that. I sigh, "I know…"

"I've got things to do…"

"Alright…" I say hanging up.

She said exactly what I thought she would say. I'm ruining my career, I can't raise a baby on my own, and all that kind of stuff. She even thought it was just some random, which I think almost anyone would think for me; I almost never date. I always spend all my time working and doing shows so I never really go out for fun. Some people think I really should loosen up, but I just don't know how. Theater's all I've ever done. I was raised to eat, sleep, and breathe theater. So what am I supposed to do now?

* * *

><p><strong>And that's chapter three, everybody! Hope y'all are enjoying, 'cause I'm really loving writing this. I love getting into characters and what they think. (If you haven't guessed, I'm Ivy's writer. Note that some of the things in here are written in for a reason ;D haha.)<strong>

**Blah, blah blah, rant, rant, rant,_ (insert long monologue about how people don't give feedback anymore),_ review please! **

**Reviews = better chances of updates! =] (And they're obviously getting longer! Yay!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter four of _Ambition!_ Yay! Julia yells at Ellis, Eileen at Derek, and Tom is all good and helps Ivy.**

**By the way, guys? Who here is really mad at Ivy after _The Cost of the Art_? Because I went onto my tumblr and like the entire page was filled with hate stuff on Monday night. I'm beginning to think it's effecting my number of readers. Hasn't gone up much for a while… the stories about Karen have. Idk…**

**I thought she was being kinda mean to Karen and all that, but she **

**A) Didn't deserve all _that_ hate (someone said they hate her more than_ Ellis_!) and**

**B) Has some good reason to be that insecure about Marilyn. I heard Karen will be replacing her next week and I also thought Derek was kinda being a jerk all _"there's nothing safe about being a star!"_ then going off to have sex _again._**

**So yeah… anyways, (shut up, me) read on!**

* * *

><p><em>Marilyn the Musical…<em>

_Julia's POV_

I was furious when I found out Ellis overheard Ivy talking to Karen. I expected her to go to Karen, she really needs a friend right now and having someone there could help her. I walk into Tom's office and sure enough I find exactly who I'm looking for, Ellis. "do you realize what you've done?"

"What did I do this time?" he says, trying to sound as innocent as possible.

"I think you know what you did" I reply, trying to stay calm but it's not exactly working.

"Is this about Ivy?" he asks.

"yes! it's about Ivy"

"I didn't think Derek would get that mad at her..." he says. Wow, he must not know Derek like he says he does or else he wouldn't have said that. Derek is furious, he tried to fire the poor girl.

"why did you tell him? that was something for her to tell, and no one else" I ask, hopefully making sense to him that this is a serious issue for Ivy and she needs to keep it in her hands.

"I didn't want him to do something with the choreography that could hurt her again" he replies, trying to act like he cares, when really, I don't think he does.

"you should have gone to her first. now she's scared and has no idea what she's going to do"

"I'm sorry... I wasn't thinking when I told him and it was stupid" he tells me, in an attempt to apologize.

"I think I just might have to fire you for real this time" I snap, I'm furious with him right now.

"Please don't fire me! I really wanna be a part of this..." he begs.

"you screwed up once and you really screwed up with Ivy, you hurt her Ellis" I remind him, I don't think he realizes the magnitude of what he's done.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean for that to happen" he apologizes again, sounding like a little kid who just got busted by his mother.

"try apologizing to Ivy, did you know that Derek wants nothing to do with the baby? that she has to do this alone?" I practically yell at him. He's quiet. Good, I think he realizes what he's done.

"you're walking a really thin line Ellis. no more eavesdropping or whatever it is that you were doing when you found out"

"Alright.." he says, making his way out of the room. I slouch down in Tom's chair, texting him and asking for Starbucks, I need something to get me through the rest of the day if I'm gonna have to argue with more idiots.

Derek Wills' POV

I'm working on another song when Eileen comes walking over, looking angry.

"DEREK!" she yells.

This is ridiculous. How many times have I been interrupted during rehearsals now? First that way-too-gay-to-be-straight assistant of Tom's shows up, telling me he heard Karen and Ivy talking, then Tom yells at me, and now Eileen's here. I bet it's about Ivy again.

"What?" I basically yell back, exasperated and annoyed.

"What's going on with Ivy?" Eileen demands. I knew it. I'd be so much better off if I never got involved with that blonde and just cast her as Marilyn and be done with it.

"She can't be Marilyn," I say flatly.

"Why?"

"She's pregnant," I tell her.

"Seriously?" Eileen looks pretty mad about the whole situation now. This is ridiculous, why do they all care about Ivy so much?

"Yeah. I'm not going to let her be Marilyn unless she gets an abortion or something…" I really don't care what she does, but if she keeps it I'm not letting her be Marilyn. Unless she gets rid of it, Karen's the new Marilyn.

"I doubt she'll get an abortion," Eileen says.

"Last time I saw her she said she would do anything for the lead," I point out.

"Really? Even sleep with you? Cuz I'm pretty sure you're the dad," Eileen says, still looking mad.

"Yeah I already talked to her about that," I say.

"And?"

"I don't want anything to do with it. If she's gonna have it she'll be doing it herself," I tell her.

"That's ridiculous," Eileen says irritably, crossing her arms.

"I'm not going to help with this."

"Why?" she asks, looking at me.

"I don't want anything to do with that baby," I tell her.

"So what is she gonna do?" Eileen asks.

"Whatever she's gonna do about it. I don't really care," I say, making it sound like I really don't care. I can't say that I'm interested, but I do need to know what she does do, as the director and also as the father considering everybody else holds me responsible.

"Really, Derek? I think you'd be a little more supportive," Eileen says, still annoyed.

"Why should I be?" I ask her.

"You're the father!" she snaps.

"I just said I don't care about that baby and I don't. I don't want anything to do with it and Ivy can do whatever she wants about it!" I yell, getting really annoyed with everyone talking about this.

"So who's gonna be marilyn now?"

"Karen."

"Okay," Eileen says, "Just don't sleep with her"

"She wouldn't anyways," I say back.

Eileen sighs. "And Ivy would?"

"It's not like I forced her to," I reply.

"And it got her pregnant!" she yells at me "That's ridiculous."

"I didn't think she'd get knocked up!" I yell back.

"You're crazy."

"It's the truth," I tell her.

"Whatever. Just don't do anything to hurt Karen," Eileen says, walking off.

"I won't. She's not anywhere near as desperate as Ivy was," I say.

"Really?" Eileen comes back over to me.

"Ivy had been on the stage for ten years in the ensemble. She was desperate for a lead," I explain, Karen hadn't felt as desperate to get a lead, she just really wanted it is more than anything else I could say for her. She didn't act like she needed it.

"I know that!"

"Karen's not like that. She's never going to go that far for anything," I say.

"You sure?" Eileen asks, walking away.

I know Karen wouldn't do that the same way Ivy did. Karen wanted to be Marilyn, and she worked her ass off to get the chance, but she didn't seem to want it quite as much as Ivy did. When Ivy got it, the sex helped, but it wasn't all there was to my choice.

When Ivy sang at that audition, she sang with a fiery passion for the part, and when she did her readings she had been studying Marilyn to know everything about the role she wanted. Karen never tried half that hard, though she did put her efforts of the same amount into her dancing, but Ivy knew her character by the callback, which in the end was just what we needed for Marilyn.

_Ivy Lynn's Apartment…_

Ivy Lynn's POV

I've been crying again. I hate calling my mom so much, and this is exactly why. No matter what I tell her, she gets mad at me. First I told her I was going to play Marilyn and she just talked about my brother. Now I called her when I needed her and she just yelled at me. All I wanted from my mom was love and I've never gotten it. All she does is concentrate on my career and push me harder. I was supposed to be a Broadway star, not a would-be lead and a seasoned chorus girl, and she won't fully accept me until I fulfill her dreams.

I just really need to talk to someone. Anyone. I can't call Julia again, and I don't think she needs to know how calling my mom went. I'll just call Tom, he's one of my closest friends since I started performing in Heaven on Earth. That's how I got to know him, actually. He and Julia were starting to make Heaven on Earth and they needed people to try out their new music. I got a job with their ensemble and Tom and I hit it off from the beginning. He's probably one of the people I talk to most when I need someone.

"Hey Ivy…" he says as he picks up.

"Hey…"

"Everything okay?" he asks, sounding a little concerned.

"I told my mom," I say sadly, having finally stopped my crying.

"How'd that go?" he asks.

"She basically said I ruined my chances at getting the lead," I tell him. She's probably right, too. I'm not Marilyn so what else do I have? Nothing. And I probably won't get anything else after this all blows over either…

I can hear Tom sigh. "No, you didn't. Julia's gonna adopt your baby and then we're gonna try to get you a lead here or somewhere else."

The thing is, I'm still not sure if that's actually what I want to do. I know I made it sound like I did, and it would be the best choice for everyone, but that doesn't mean that I'm _sure_ that's what I really want.

"It's gonna be okay…" Tom says reassuringly.

"Maybe I just shouldn't go through with all of this…" I suddenly say, it being the first thing I can think of saying.

"Why are you saying that?"

"If I don't have it I still have a shot at being Marilyn…" I say. I'm not entirely sure this is that good of an idea either, but the risks of anything happening are really low from what I've heard, and then I could just keep being Marilyn. My mom and the press would never even have to know.

"Really, Ivy?" Tom asks, "Are you thinking about having an abortion…"

"We could all just pretend this never happened," I tell him, beginning to wonder if this would be a better idea than having it but letting Julia adopt it… but even abortions are pretty pricey and I don't think I have the money to spare for even that. I guess I could ask Derek since he's the one that told me to get rid of it, but I don't think he'd be very happy with losing money on it either.

"I just think you're upset right now," Tom says, "Have you talked to your doctor since the hospital?"

"No, I haven't gotten to it yet…" And I never go to the doctor. Just another part of saving money to pay the rent. Being an actress, I really have to watch how much money I spend to make sure I can pay the rent by the time it's due. Usually that means buying the crappy cheap food, never going to the doctor, and trying not to go shopping too much.

"You should. It might help you figure out what's really the best thing," Tom points out, which is true. It might help me figure out what I'm doing…

"It might just be easier for everyone if we just acted like this never happened…" I sigh. This all would've been so much easier if I just hadn't gone and slept with Derek to begin with…

"I'm gonna call your doctor for you if you don't go," Tom says, "It seems like you really need someone to help you sort through this."

"Alright…"

"You aren't alone, Ivy… even though Derek made it seem that way, you aren't." I don't really say anything to that. I don't have much I _could_ say to that. "You're alone right now, aren't you?"

"Yeah," I say.

"Do you want me to come over for a while?" he offers.

"Yeah," I say again. I really just want somebody to be here with me… it might help right now… I just need some company here…

"Okay, just try to relax…"

"Alright."

Tom Levitt's POV

I get to Ivy's and she sounded like she was upset when we talked on the phone. I hope everything's really okay with her.

"Ivy…" I call, knocking on the door. Nothing.

I knock again, "It's Tom… are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she says, yanking the apartment door open.

"You sure?" I ask, stepping inside.

"Yeah," she sighs, closing the door behind me. Her apartment is pretty messy right now, there's envelopes stacked up on her counter, a few empty glasses in the sink and I can see there's a pile of clothes in the corner of the living room.

"You seem upset…" I calmly tell her.

"My mom wasn't happy when I told her…" she says, slumping down on the couch.

I sigh, but sit next to her, "We talked about that, we knew it was possible."

"I knew she wouldn't be, but Julia thought I should tell her…"

"You did the right thing though. Give it some time before you talk about the adoption," I reassure her, she needs to know she's making some good choices.

"She knows I'm not keeping it," she tells me.

"Alright… can I get you anything to help you feel any better?" I ask, I know she can't have caffeine but I'm sure there's something that will help her relax.

"I'm fine…"

"When was the last time you ate?" I ask her. When she gets busy she seems to slack on eating and taking care of herself. It's not healthy if she does that now.

"Uhm… I haven't had much time to think about eating…" she says, hanging her head.

"Well you're eating. now. you have to eat," I tell her. I can't let her go hungry, it's not good for the baby.

"Mmk…" she sighs.

"What do you want?"

"I don't care."

"Alright… I'll get you something" I say, squeezing her shoulder as I get up.

I go into her kitchen, most of the cabinets are bare and only have a few plates and bowls in them. I open her refrigerator and find that she only has a small carton of milk, some fruit that looks a few days old, and a to go box. I finally find a microwaveable meal in her freezer and decide to heat it up for her, it's gonna have to do for now, she needs something.

"Have a few bites of this…" I say, smiling at her when I bring her the plastic tray with a small piece of chicken and some veggies on it.

She's quiet as she starts picking at the broccoli and I can tell she's still upset.

"Julia said you didn't know how far along you were," I tell her. That concerned me, I would think that was something she'd remember.

"I wasn't really listening when they said…" she quietly says, cutting the chicken into smaller pieces.

I sigh, "Good thing I was, it's a little over fourteen weeks…"

"Oh…" she mumbles, taking a sip of the lemonade I'd brought her.

"See, this is why we need to get you to the doctor" I tell her, she needs someone to really explain all of her options to her before she makes a decision. She's quiet and nibbles on another piece of broccoli.

"I'm calling in the morning. We need to make sure you're still healthy," I say to her

"Alright," she sighs, putting the half eaten meal back on the coffee table.

_Doctor's Office…_

I'd called her doctor and was able to get her an appointment for the next morning. I told Derek we'd be late to rehearsal and he agreed, we just need to make sure everything's okay with the baby.

We're sitting in the waiting room and her foot hasn't stopped bouncing since we sat down. One of her hands is on the arm of the chair, and the other is resting on her thigh. I gently rest my hand on top of hers and squeeze it. "Just breathe, it's okay," I tell her.

I notice her leg slows down just a little, but she's still bouncing it, and I can tell she's anxious. It's a good thing the doctor comes when they do because I don't think she could have sat there much longer.

We get inside an exam room and Ivy changes into a light pink gown. She climbs up onto the exam table and her leg starts bouncing, again.

There's a knock on the door and Ivy tells them it's okay to come in. She forces a smile at the tall brunette woman.

"Hey Ivy, how're you feeling?" the doctor asks, glancing down at her chart.

"Fine…" Ivy says, shooting a nervous glance at me.

"I'm looking at your chart and it shows records from the hospital that you're pregnant…" the woman says, flipping through some pages and glancing up at Ivy.

"Yeah… I found out last time I was here…" she says, she's siting on her hands now and she's swinging her legs.

"We're just gonna run a couple of tests to make sure everything's okay and do an ultrasound…" the woman says, smiling at Ivy.

"Alright."

I had to hold Ivy's hand while they draw blood, she was terrified of the needle. The doctor went to take the blood to the lab and told Ivy to go ahead and lay down so she could relax. She obeyed her doctor's suggestion and held her hand out to me like she wanted me right there with her.

Her doctor came back in a few minutes later, pushing an ultrasound machine. I stand on the opposite side of Ivy's bed and hold her hand as the woman slowly lifts up Ivy's gown and starts her ultrasound.

"Have you been eating okay?" she asks, glancing at the screen.

"Not that much…" Ivy replies, shooting me another nervous glance.

"You need to eat to keep your energy up," her doctor says.

"I know, I haven't been thinking about eating that much…"

"Is there something else going on?" the brunette woman asks, and gives Ivy a small, but reassuring smile.

"Yeah…" she sighs.

"Is it something you wanna talk about?" her doctor asks, glancing at the screen again.

"Not really…" Ivy quietly says.

"You don't have to tell me. But is there someone you can tell?"

"Yeah," she replies, squeezing my hand.

"Alright. Well, everything looks healthy right now. You need to make sure you eat a little more," the doctor says as she finishes up the ultrasound.

"Mmk…"

"Do you know who the father is?" the woman asks.

"Tom," Ivy says, looking up at me, begging me to agree with her.

This causes the woman to smile, since Ivy introduced me to her doctor. "I'm sure everything will work out fine…"

Ivy's quiet as she sits up and the doctor finishes writing some notes in Ivy's chart.

"I wanna see you again in about a month. Things are looking good right now," the woman says smiling. She quietly leaves the room and I let Ivy change back into the black sweats and baby pink cardigan she was wearing. She just sighs as we walk out of the exam room to make her next appointment.

* * *

><p><strong>And that's chapter four! Please review, everyone! I'd love to see what you think since I have like a million hits and only 7 reviews! Just please, tell me how this is?<strong>

**Btw on tumblr I ended up making a new blog, _The Ivy Lynn Movement_ (donthatetheblonde . tumblr . com) so if anyone wants to look at that… (My friend told me to make a movement so I got bored and did it.)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter five! Wow! Never thought I'd get this far with all the times I end up forsaking my stories! May go back and make small edits to this story later, but whatever!**

* * *

><p><em>Marilyn the Musical…<em>

Ivy Lynn's POV

Agh Derek is gonna kill me. He's still pissed about this whole thing and I just _had_ to sleep in this morning! After noticing how late I woke up I jumped into the shower and literally ran back out again, throwing on the closest pieces of clothing I saw and ran out the door, completely forgetting the sheet music I'd need for the day and to brush my hair. I didn't even bother with the makeup just to make sure I don't get any later.

As I run in, Tom pulls me aside, looking concerned. "You okay?" he asks.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I tell him, moving to get into the studio.

"Are you sure?" he asks, pulling me in front of a mirror. I really did look like crap. My hair is dripping wet and hanging in messy curls around my face. My face seems a little pale without the music and I just overall look bad.

"I overslept…" I tell him.

Tom sighs. "Everything else okay?"

"I'm fine, alright," I tell him.

"Go home and rest…" Tom tells me.

"I'm fine, Tom," I sigh, I really need to work before they make me quit.

"Your hair is wet, and you look pale," Tom says, looking at me. "Go home, eat, and get some sleep."

"I ate on the way here," I lie.

"What did you eat?"

"A bit of fruit…" I say, referring to a tiny mandarin orange I stuffed into my mouth whole as I ran out the door.

"You've gotta eat more than that…" Tom says, sounding a little exasperated.

"I just got it when I was leaving my apartment," I tell him.

"Do I have to take you home and cook for you so you'll eat?"

"No."

"When was the last time you ate a real meal?" Tom asks. He's so concerned with my eating habits, but he really doesn't have to. This is how I've always eaten…

"Last night?" I say, but it comes out sounding more like a question that an answer.

"When I cooked… so it looks like I'm taking you home so you'll eat…"

"Tom…" I sigh. I really wanna work today. I haven't been allowed to work much since the doctor said I'm pregnant, but I really wanna keep working on Marilyn before Derek tries to fire me again.

"You told the doctor I'm the baby's father so I might as well act like it," Tom tells me, "You need to be at home, resting."

"I'll be fine, I wanna keep working here while I still can," I tell him, and he looks like he understands what I'm saying, but he's still being stubborn about this.

"Not on a few bites of fruit," he says, "At least let me go get you something"

"Fine…" I say, starting to get annoyed. I really don't need everyone watching my every move. I can take care of myself, I always have.

"What do you want?" Tom asks.

"There's a Starbucks down the street…"

"You can't have caffeine," he says. "Try again."

"I didn't mean the coffee, Tom…" I say flatly, "They have coffee cake and stuff."

"Alright fine. Just take it easy"

"Alright…" I sigh.

_Later…_

I'm in the middle of _20__th__ Century Fox_ when I can feel a slight burning in my throat. I need to keep going, though, and I ignore it, trying to push it back down. I still haven't eaten that much yet, so all that's trying to come up is acid which hurts my throat and is making it harder to sing. Finally I can't hold it down any longer and I run out and into the bathroom.

As I'm kneeling over a toilet, still gagging and throwing up what little I _did_ eat today, I can hear footsteps coming to the door of the bathroom.

"Ivy? Everything okay…" I hear Tom say, sounding worried.

"I'll be right out," I call back, flushing the toilet and rinsing out my mouth with some water.

"You sure you okay?" Tom asks.

"Yeah," I lie. My throat still is burning so I cup my hand under the sink and drink some cold water. It doesn't help much, but it makes my throat a little less sore.

"I'm pretty sure I heard you throwing up," Tom says. "Come on Ivy, I'm trying to help you…"

"Okay I'm alright now," I say, walking out and starting back into the studio when Tom grabs my shoulder.

"Ivy, be honest," he says, "Did you just throw up?"

I sigh. "Yeah."

"You're taking a break," Tom says, "I don't want you to overwork yourself"

"I'll be fine, I'm not overworking myself."

"I don't want you doing anything that could hurt you, or the baby… just ten minutes to make sure you're not gonna get sick again"

"Fine…" I finally say. I know I'm not gonna win this one. Julia will probably say the same thing when I come back in.

"You've gotta think about the baby Ivy."

I sigh. "I know, but I can't just stop…"

"It's ten minutes Ivy," Tom says, putting his hand on my shoulder. "If you keep this up, I'll get your doctor to put you on bed rest…"

"Tom, I don't need bed rest!" I practically yell at him. I am nowhere near needing bed rest! And I'd be so bored, there's nothing to do. I've probably seen every movie in my apartment at least fifty times, more for the Marilyn movies since I started studying those.

"Not yet, but if you don't relax and take time to take care of yourself you will."

"I'm trained for Broadway and I spent my whole life in the theater, I'm not used to slowing down like this…" I tell him. I just wasn't raised to not be performing onstage, and just as a New Yorker I can't just _not_ be doing anything. No one in New York can just sit around, and I'm pretty sure anyone would agree.

He squeezes my shoulder, "I know it's different, but after you have the baby you can do things the way you want to."

"I just need something to do…" I whine, I've been dying of boredom lately whenever I'm not at Marilyn, and I'm gonna die of boredom _at_ Marilyn if I can't perform either.

"I know," Tom says, "You can still come here, just not really do much"

Julia Houston's POV

Ivy's having a hard time right now because she's a little sick because of the pregnancy. She showed up this morning with wet hair and no makeup on. I decide to check on her. she's sitting in a chair so I sit next to her, and she mumbles a small hi. I can just tell she's not feeling well at all.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" I ask her, I think she's been on the fence lately.

"I can't keep it," she sighs.

"Alright. But you can see it whenever you want…" I remind her, I'm not gonna keep her from seeing her own child if she wants to see it.

"Okay…" she says, closing her eyes.

"In order for it to work Derek is gonna have to sign away his rights…" I explain.

"I think that's going to be the easiest part of the whole process…"

I sigh, "Yeah… you're probably right"

"He doesn't want anything to do with it," she tells me, I think it's sad that this baby will know who it's father is but he wants nothing to do with the child.

"I know. But it's a good thing Tom is helping you through this," I say, giving her a small smile.

"He pretty much drags me home to cook me food… it's kind of weird…" she tells me.

"He's just looking out for you… he doesn't want you to do this alone…" I say to her, none of us, except Derek want her to do this alone. It's not easy.

"He's still angry at Derek. I can't exactly figure out why," I tell her.

"Uhm… he's the father," she says, sounding a little annoyed.

"Yeah. Are you sure Tom is gay? After this whole thing happened I've been questioning it…" I ask her, he's been so good to Ivy I'm quite sure right now.

"Why would you be questioning it? I heard he was interested in Ellis," she asks, sounding a little surprised.

"The way he's been taking care of you. It's just different for him," he's acting as if he's the father and the one that's gonna help her through all of this.

"He just cares… I got close to him when I was working on your last show with him," she tells me.

"I know. Everything is gonna be fine…" I reassure her, I think she needs to hear this a lot more now than she used to.

"It would probably be best if I didn't see the baby after its born for a while, it might get confused…" she quietly says.

"Alright… I just want this to work out for you," I tell her, I can understand why she wouldn't want to see the baby, I think she just wants to pretend this never happened after the adoption goes through.

"Well this is doing something for both of us, you wanted to adopt a baby…" she says, trying to smile.

I gently squeeze her shoulder, "Yeah, I'll talk to Derek so you don't have to." It seems as if every time they talk now, he ends up yelling at her and that's just not what she needs right now.

"I don't think it really matters who tells him, it won't make a difference to him."

"I just don't want him to upset you again, that's all…" I say, trying to get her to calm down.

"I'll be fine, I don't think he's going to yell again," she quietly says.

"You never know with him…" I remind her.

"I know but I was just being overemotional too…" she says, it's normal for her to be so emotional right now, she's got a lot going on.

"That's okay. You were scared and he was angry. It just wasn't the best time," I remind her, that's never a good mix to talk about something so important like this.

"Don't worry about it," I tell her, but she's quiet.

I give her a small smile… "I'll just tell him when I see him…"

Ivy Lynn's POV

I hate having to just sit here. Derek isn't letting me dance and I'm not supposed to be acting that much either. So pretty much I just have to sit here and watch Karen be Marilyn. I couldn't be any more bored. I know that I was getting sick earlier and I still feel pretty squeamish, but I'd rather be dancing and risking getting sick than just sitting here feeling like crap.

After the number is done Michael comes up to me and sits by me. "Hey," he says.

"Hey…" I sigh.

"How're things going?" he asks.

"Just bored…" I say, looking at him.

"Yeah… you feeling okay?" he asks. He probably saw me run off earlier and I still probably look like crap with my hair everywhere and I didn't even put any makeup on before I got here.

"Yeah…" I say, "Just haven't been sleeping as well."

He sighs. "That's normal though. Have you thought about what you're gonna do after the baby's born?"

"Yeah, I have," I say sadly. I know what I'm doing but I'm still not completely sure if that's really what I want to do or not.

"Do you know what you want yet?"

"I think I'm gonna have Julia adopt it but I've been thinking twice about that…" I sigh, looking at the floor.

"I know Julia would be a good mom, but have you ever been around kids before?" Michael asks me.

"No… I never really got the chance," even when my mom was all crazy just wanting me to do Broadway when my brother was around she wouldn't even care about me at all. I was always either at a theater or wherever my brother was, so I never got to be around kids. I had some friends who have kids, but we began to grow apart or lose contact soon after, they'd be busy with their families and I'd be working on a new Broadway.

"Maybe that's part of why you're scared about making this decision," Michael says.

"I don't know how to take care of a kid…" I sigh, remembering he has a son. "You have a family, what's that like?" I ask, maybe if he can tell me more it'll help me think about this more.

"It's hard sometimes, but my wife understands," he tells me, "I'm sure she'd let you come over for a while…"

"Oh…" It's probably easier for him than it would be for me, he's got his wife. I'm single and Derek pretty much hates me now so I can't really get help like him… I could ask Tom, but he's got better things to do than help me.

"It's less scary if you've been around kids before you have one of your own."

"I wasn't really planning on having my own kids…" I sigh, "I didn't want to end up like my mom." They say most people end up like their parents and raise their kids the same way, but I don't want to be like that. My mom raised me by herself and she was crazy. She didn't really care about me as me as much as me for my career.

Michael sighs. "What was your mom like?" he asks.

"She was one of those crazy stage moms…" I say, still looking at the floor.

"If you know you don't want to be like her, you can try to change that," he tells me, putting a hand on my shoulder comfortingly.

It felt good, him caring and trying to help me feel better about this, but I soon move so he isn't touching me anymore. "Her career ended because of me and it made her push me to make that dream happen she never got," I say, looking back up at him.

I was born under similar circumstances as the baby I'm having, my mom used to use the casting couch to get her lead on Broadway, but then she won a Tony when she proved herself talented. But she still went on trying to seduce directors to make sure she got the leads, but instead she ended up with me. Nobody cast her since.

"I can tell that's not what you wanted, but if you decide to keep the baby, you can do all the things you wanted your mom to do, that she never did," Michael says.

"I didn't know what I wanted to do. The stage was my whole life."

He sighs. "You don't have to push your kid that way if they don't want it, I'm not forcing my son to do anything he doesn't want to."

"You probably weren't raised that way," I tell him, he has two parents and he has wife to be with him and his son.

"I wasn't, but I know it can be hard when you are…"

"I don't really make enough money to keep the baby anyways…" I sigh. I barely eat out and I always buy the cheapest foods I can find in the store. I used to live off of Starbucks coffee every morning and I barely scrape by with the rent every month. I don't even go see a doctor yearly because of the steep price for an appointment.

"You have friends that want to help you, you don't have to be scared to ask," Michael says.

"I can't ask," I sigh. My friends are all in the Broadway business and most of them aren't much better off. Karen's one of the best off out of all of us actors and ensemble members, but that's because she has a well off boyfriend that works for the city.

"Yeah, you can…"

"I work with all my friends," I tell him, "Dancers don't get paid much either."

He sighs. "Do you have any other family besides your mom?"

"No. My dad left my mom when he found out about me." He was a director like Derek, he never really cared about the rest of us and just cared about two things: making a smash and getting laid. When he got my mom pregnant with me, he just told her it was her own problem and left her.

My brother, on the other hand was a planned baby. My mom had finally found a man to marry and he wanted another kid, since he couldn't care less about me. My brother was always the real focus between the two of us. I used to get along with him, (to a degree…) so I guess I could've asked for help, but he's not in the best shape either so even if we were still somewhat close it would be pointless to ask him.

"You have us here to talk to… if you still want to come over, just let me know," Michael says. He really looks like he cares,

"Alright," I say, feeling a small smile on my face.

"It's gonna be fine… you're just worrying so much," he tells me. He's probably right.

"How can I not? I'm gonna be a single mom actress in New York City… I don't even have another job." Most of my other friends who do Broadway and the ensemble like me have second jobs in places like the ensemble, but I never really got around to doing that. I'm just not good at doing anything other than singing.

"I know, but Julia wants to help you…"

"I can't ask Julia for anything," I say. I really don't want to. I already work for her in two separate shows and she pays me for both of them. I can't just ask for more help when she's already helping me.

"Yes you can, you were able to ask her to think about adopting," Michael says, but I asked her because I already knew she was trying to adopt. I wouldn't ask her to think about adopting if I hadn't already heard about the Chinese baby.

"I already did," I say.

"I know, it's okay to let someone help you," Michael says.

"I can't…" It's not letting someone help me that's the problem, it's nice to know the want to, but I've done everything on my own for so long that it just feels weird when someone else does stuff for me, and I don't wanna ask Julia for more money when she's already technically my boss. I know I barely scrape by for the rent, but I can't just ask for more. She's got her own stuff to pay for.

"Why not?" he asks, "It's okay to ask every once in a while."

"If I decide to keep it I have to try to take care of it myself…" I tell him.

"Yeah, but if you need something it's okay to let us know."

"I'm just trying to figure out how to do this…" I sigh, "I might need to get another job since I can't do Heaven anymore."

"That's could help, I can talk to my wife and see if she'd help you take care of the baby," Michael

"You don't have to…" I say.

He sighs. "You sure?"

"Yeah," I say.

"Alright, but if you change your mind, I can always ask her," Michael says.

"Alright," I sigh.

Karen Cartwright's POV

It seems as if I'm the only one who hasn't talked to Ivy about this, well, since she told me about it. I know a lot more has happened since, and I've seen her talking to Julia a lot. I wonder what's going on. We're on break right now so I decide to talk to her, she looks really bored anyways. I would be if I had to sit in a theater and watch them work on a play I was supposed to be in. "Hey."

"Hey…" she says, smiling. It could be fake for all I know.

"How're you doing?" I ask her, there's no way this is easy for her.

She sighs, "Fine. I don't really even get why I still even come here… I can't really do anything."

"Probably since you don't have anything else to do. You are my understudy, so it makes sense," I tell her. It's actually good she's here, she's watching everything that's going on. So if, heaven forbid, something were to happen to me before she has the baby, she could step in.

"Yeah, but it gets boring… I just don't like staying at home alone…" she says, but it makes sense.

"That makes sense. I don't really like being by myself sometimes either…" it's the truth, if Dev is working I'm not a huge fan of being alone in our apartment.

She sighs, "What do you think I should do about this baby?"

"What have you been thinking about doing?" I ask, that's a big question, and she really needs to think about this.

"I'm letting Julia adopt it but I'm not sure if I want to or not…" she replies. That would explain why she's talking to Julia so much.

"I know Julia would take really good care of it, and you could still see the baby if she adopted it." She already has a kid, I'm sure she would be a great mother to this baby too.

"Yeah…"

"I know Derek hasn't been really supportive, and that can make this ten times harder than it should be," I tell her, I don't understand why he's this way though, she needs him to help her through this, he is the dad.

"He told me I have to do it all myself so Tom has been helping…" she tells me.

"That's good, do you think Tom would help out if you kept the baby?" I ask, he probably would, they've been friends for a long time.

"Probably. Do you think I should?" she asks.

"You should talk to Tom about it before you decide, but it really is up to you," I suggest, I don't want to make this decision for her.

"Tom isn't really that involved… he's still gay," she says, but looks defeated.

I sigh, "But he could still be there to help you out… you need somebody"

"I know, I can't do this myself…" she tells me. She really can't, she's single, and I don't think her family is there for her.

"That's why we want to help you, you've just gotta tell us what you want" I say, I don't think she's ever had anybody help her.

She sighs, "I just don't know what I want..." it's still early, so she has some time to decide.

"Who else have you talked to about this?" I ask, she's probably asked everybody what they think.

"I asked Michael…" That's good, he has a family, and is on Broadway. So I'm sure he was able to help her.

"What did he say?"

"He said its hard but his wife understands and supports him being an actor. He also told me it wouldn't be easy for me to raise the baby myself…" she tells me.

"It's hard being a single mom, but if you think it's something you can do, then there's nothing wrong with keeping the baby." If she keeps the baby, it'll be good for the kid. But it wouldn't really have a supportive family, and I think she wants that for the baby.

"I just don't know if I can do that…" she says.

"What does your mom think?" I ask.

"She's still just mad that I got pregnant. She said I'm ruining my career…"

I sigh, "That doesn't help anything…" My mom would probably say the same thing, but end up being supportive and help me.

"She's right…"

"You don't know that. I'm sure there's something else you can do," I tell her.

"I don't know anything outside of theater… I was raised to believe that theater was my life."

I sigh, I guess that's what happens sometimes when you live here your whole life. "Well I'm sure there will be other parts you can get once you have this baby."

"If I keep it though I can't do Broadway at the same time…" she says, it'll be hard, but if she meets somebody she'll probably be able to do it.

"I know…"

She sighs, "I just don't want to be like my mom."

"That makes sense, but if you know that's not what you want to be, you can change that," I explain, she knows what she didn't like growing up, so she can make sure her kid doesn't have to experience the same things.

"My mom had me after sleeping with a director. Her career fell apart after that…"

"You don't have to let this ruin your career," I tell her, if she works hard enough she can probably still get a lead.

"It still might."

"You don't know that," I remind her.

"I'd be a single mom and my career is ten years in the ensemble. I don't think that's going to get me anywhere," she tells me, sounding defeated.

I sigh, "You're gonna figure this out, it's okay."

She just sighs, and seems a little annoyed.

"You're just worrying too much," I tell her, it's pretty obvious that she is.

"I can't help but worry…"

I sigh, "You're gonna figure this out, you have Tom and Julia to help you too."

"I know…"

"So you can talk to them too," I tell her, but before she can say anything else, Derek calls us back together to work again.

Julia Houston's POV

Ivy's been talking with Karen, and now she's coming to me again. She doesn't really have any family to confide in, so it makes sense as to why she wants to talk to all of us. "Hey…"

"Hey…" she says, trying to smile.

"What's up?" I ask her.

"I was just talking to Karen…"

"Oh, what did you talk about?" It's good that she feels like she has friends here.

"I don't know what I wanna do…"

I sigh, this has been really hard for her, "Still on the fence, huh…"

"Yeah…" she says, wringing her hands.

"That's okay, you still have a while to think about this," I remind her. She's still got a couple months, so it's okay if she doesn't know right now.

"I know but it would probably be best to just know now…" she says.

"Yeah, I promise Frank and I are gonna take good care of your baby, you don't have to worry," I reassure her, we've

"I still just sometimes wonder what it would be like if I had a normal life… my mom never let me when I was younger…" she tells me, and she sounds a little upset.

"If you decided to take some time off to be a mom, we'd still be here to support you," I tell her, she just needs a friend to help her.

"You would?" she asks, almost like she doesn't believe me.

"yeah, we know it's not easy to do it alone," I tell her.

"That's what Michael said…"

"What else did Michael say?" I ask, it's good that she talked to him, he has a family and knows what it's like.

"He just said how it's still hard but his wife understands…"

I sigh, "You can be a good mom Ivy, I can help you."

"I'm still just afraid of doing it by myself…" she hangs her head, if she did keep it, I would make sure she had everything she needed and Frank and I decided we would help her if she asked us to.

"It's okay to be scared, this is something completely different for you," I remind her, she's quiet.

I squeeze her shoulder, "Just try not to worry."

She sighs, "Okay…"

"You can call me if you need to talk about anything, I want to help you," we're just going to have to keep reminding her this, it's new to her and I don't think she's realized it yet.

"Alright…" she quietly says, looking really distracted.

* * *

><p><strong>Alright, guys, listen up! As you can see, Ivy's super on the fence about keeping this baby or not. And guess what! You get to decide what she does! Emily and I've got two versions written up and ready for you, so now you get to say! Do you want Ivy to keep the baby, and try to raise it as a single mom, or do you think she should give it to Julia and try to move on with her life? It's your choice! All ya gotta do is press the little purple review box!<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**Look! Finally a new update! Sorry this took FOREVER but I never had time to get on my laptop and put this back in order!**

**Also, know that this story is AU, so there's some stuff that's obviously different. They made it more official in The Workshop but this is so everyone knows with the Karen scenes and stuff. I really do think they could get along had they been in a different situation and stuff… and in the case of this story I think Ivy knows Karen isn't doing as well as she could as Derek points out in his POV… so yeah.**

**So you know, wee did start writing this before Smash started airing with only the pilot to go off of for several weeks, so there you have it. Excuse the differences… though this could still possibly happen to Ivy somewhere in the season considering all the sex… so… here ya go!**

* * *

><p>Karen's POV<p>

It seems as if I'm the only one who hasn't talked to Ivy about this, well, since she told me about it. I know a lot more has happened since, and I've seen her talking to Julia a lot. I wonder what's going on. We're on break right now so I decide to talk to her, she looks really bored anyways. I would be if I had to sit in a theater and watch them work on a play I was supposed to be in. "hey"

"Hey..." she says, smiling. It could be fake for all I know.

"how're you doing?" I ask her, there's no way this is easy for her.

She sighs, "Fine. I don't really even get why I still even come here... I can't really do anything"

"probably since you don't have anything else to do. you are my understudy, so it makes sense" I tell her. It's actually good she's here, she's watching everything that's going on. So if, heaven forbid, something were to happen to me before she has the baby, she could step in.

"Yeah but it gets boring... I just don't like staying at home alone..." she says, but it makes sense.

"that makes sense. I don't really like being by myself sometimes either..." it's the truth, if Dev is working I'm not a huge fan of being alone in our apartment.

She sighs, "What do you think I should do about this baby?"

"what have you been thinking about doing?" I ask, that's a big question, and she really needs to think about this.

"I'm letting Julia adopt it but I'm not sure if I want to or not..." she replies. That would explain why she's talking to Julia so much.

"I know Julia would take really good care of it, and you could still see the baby if she adopted it" she already has a kid, I'm sure she would be a great mother to this baby too.

"Yeah..."

"I know Derek hasn't been really supportive, and that can make this ten times harder than it should be" I tell her, I don't understand why he's this way though, she needs him to help her through this, he is the dad.

"He told me I have to do it all myself so Tom has been helping..." she tells me.

"That's good, do you think Tom would help out if you kept the baby?" I ask, he probably would, they've been friends for a long time.

"Probably. Do you think I should?" she asks.

"you should talk to Tom about it before you decide, but it really is up to you.." I suggest, I don't want to make this decision for her.

"Tom isn't really that involved... he's still gay" she says, but looks defeated.

I sigh, "but he could still be there to help you out... you need somebody"

"I know, I can't do this myself..." she tells me. She really can't, she's single, and I don't think her family is there for her.

"that's why we want to help you, you've just gotta tell us what you want" I say, I don't think she's ever had anybody help her.

She sighs, "I just don't know what I want..." it's still early, so she has some time to decide.

"who else have you talked to about this?" I ask, she's probably asked everybody what they think.

"I asked Michael..." that's good, he has a family, and is on Broadway. So I'm sure he was able to help her.

"what did he say?"

"He said its hard but his wife understands and supports him being an actor. He also told me it wouldn't be easy for me to raise the baby myself..." she tells me.

"it's hard being a single mom, but if you think it's something you can do, then there's nothing wrong with keeping the baby" if she keeps the baby, it'll be good for the kid. But it wouldn't really have a supportive family, and I think she wants that for the baby.

"I just don't know if I can do that..." she says.

"what does your mom think?" I ask.

"She's still just mad that I got pregnant. She said I'm ruining my career..."

I sigh, "that doesn't help anything..." my mom would probably say the same thing, but end up being supportive and help me.

"She's right..."

"you don't know that. I'm sure there's something else you can do" I tell her.

"I don't know anything outside of theater... I was raised to believe that theater was my life"

I sigh, I guess that's what happens sometimes when you live here your whole life. "well I'm sure there will be other parts you can get once you have this baby"

"If I keep it though I can't do Broadway at the same time..." she says, it'll be hard, but if she meets somebody she'll probably be able to do it.

"I know..."

She sighs, "I just don't want to be like my mom..."

"that makes sense, but if you know that's not what you want to be, you can change that" I explain, she knows what she didn't like growing up, so she can make sure her kid doesn't have to experience the same things.

"My mom had me after sleeping with a director. Her career fell apart after that..."

"you don't have to let this ruin your career.." I tell her, if she works hard enough she can probably still get a lead.

"It still might"

"you don't know that" I remind her.

"I'd be a single mom and my career is ten years in the ensemble. I don't think that's going to get me anywhere" she tells me, sounding defeated.

I sigh, "you're gonna figure this out, it's okay.."

She just sighs, and seems a little annoyed.

"you're just worrying too much" I tell her, it's pretty obvious that she is.

"I can't help but worry..."

I sigh, "you're gonna figure this out, you have Tom and Julia to help you too"

"I know..."

"so you can talk to them too" I tell her, but before she can say anything else, Derek calls us back together to work again.

Julia's POV

Ivy's been talking with Karen, and now she's coming to me again. she doesn't really have any family to confide in, so it makes sense as to why she wants to talk to all of us. "hey..."

"Hey..." she says, trying to smile.

"what's up?" I ask her.

"I was just talking to Karen..."

"oh, what did you talk about?" It's good that she feels like she has friends here.

"I don't know what I wanna do..."

I sigh, this has been really hard for her, "still on the fence, huh..."

"Yeah..." she says, wringing her hands.

"that's okay, you still have a while to think about this" I remind her. She's still got a couple months, so it's okay if she doesn't know right now.

"I know but it would probably be best to just know now..." she says.

"yeah, I promise frank and I are gonna take good care of your baby, you don't have to worry" I reassure her, we've

"I still just sometimes wonder what it would be like if I had a normal life... my mom never let me when I was younger..." she tells me, and she sounds a little upset.

"if you decided to take some time off to be a mom, we'd still be here to support you" I tell her, she just needs a friend to help her.

"You would?" she asks, almost like she doesn't believe me.

"yeah, we know it's not easy to do it alone" I tell her.

"That's what Michael said..."

"what else did Michael say?" I ask, it's good that she talked to him, he has a family and knows what it's like.

"He just said how it's still hard but his wife understands..."

I sigh, "you can be a good mom Ivy, I can help you"

"I'm still just afraid of doing it by myself..." she hangs her head, if she did keep it, I would make sure she had everything she needed and Frank and I decided we would help her if she asked us to.

"it's okay to be scared, this is something completely different for you" I remind her, she's quiet.

I squeeze her shoulder, "Just try not to worry"

She sighs, "Okay..."

"you can call me if you need to talk about anything, I want to help you" we're just going to have to keep reminding her this, it's new to her and I don't think she's realized it yet.

Tom's POV

I'm at home when my phone starts ringing, and the name on the caller ID doesn't surprise me, it's Ivy. I answer the phone and all I hear are sobs on the other end of the line. "Ivy?"

"Hey..." she whimpers.

"what's wrong?" I ask her, I hope nothing bad happened.

"I'm not sure about anything I'm doing..." she says, letting another sob escape. This pregnancy has not been easier for her at all.

I sigh, "let's just calm down first, and then we'll talk.."

"Mmk..." she mumbles.

"do you want me to come over?" I ask her, it might be better for her if we talked about it face to face rather than over the phone.

"Yeah..." she quietly says.

"alright. I'll be there soon.."

"Mmk..." she mumbles, and I hear the phone click.

I get there a few minutes later and knock on her apartment door, "Ivy..."

"it's Tom.." I say, after she's silent for a few minutes.

"Hey..." she says, slowly opening the door.

"sounds like you've been thinking a little too much.." I say, walking in as she closes the door behind me.

"How can I not?" she asks, sounding annoyed.

"I know, you've got a lot goin' on. But it helps to talk about it" I remind her.

"Alright..." she quietly says.

"what've you been thinking about?" I ask, sitting with her on the couch.

"Well you know I'm having Julia adopt the baby..." she says, sounding a little more calm now.

"yeah.."

"I'm not entirely sure if I want to yet..." she says, this is a really big decision for her to make and it's one that she can't do over night.

"why not?" I ask, as she leans back and hugs a pillow.

"I was thinking about it more..." she says.

"did Derek say somethin?" I ask, if he did it would make her mind go crazy.

"No..." she mumbles.

"you can tell me, it doesn't matter" I remind her, yeah, he's the director, but he's also the father and if he said something to hurt her, I want to know.

"He was asking how sure I am about this when I gave him the papers for his parental rights..." she tells me.

I sigh, "have you thought about what else you could do?"

"Yeah..."

"what do you think is the best thing?" I ask her, I know she's really worried about keeping it because of what her childhood was like.

"I don't know" she sadly says.

"I know its hard without your mom supporting you.." I tell her, gently squeezing her shoulder.

She relaxes a little under my touch, "She was never that much a mom she just wanted me to do a Broadway lead. I've spent the last ten years on Broadway in the ensemble"

"I know, but she should at least try to be here right now" I tell her, not having her mom here really has had made things so much harder than they should be.

"I don't think she cares..."

"she does. But she just has a hard time showing it" I tell her, it seems like it's true, some people just can't show that they care when they really do. It doesn't surprise me when Ivy's quiet but lets a single tear escape.

"what's the biggest thing holding you back from keeping the baby?" I ask her, there's something there that she thinks is holding her back.

"There's other things I still wanna do..." she tells me.

"is there something else besides the lead?" I ask her, when she was little she didn't get to explore anything else.

"I don't wanna do it alone" she tells me… raising a baby and being an actress wouldn't be easy at all for her.

"that makes sense. I think giving Julia the baby is a good idea" I tell her, hoping it sounds reassuring enough to settle her mind a little bit.

"She has a stable family already" she tells me.

"yeah. And you'll still get to see the baby.." I remind her, I think it's good that Julia is going to let Ivy still see her kid, which will probably help her too.

"I don't know if I want to right now..." she mumbles.

"why not?" I ask her, and get silence. Some things are difficult for her to talk about, and I think this might be one of them.

I give her shoulder a gentle squeeze, "come on ivy, you can tell me"

She's still quiet so I start to rub her shoulder, "it's okay... We've gotta work through this"

"I just know I can't keep it" she finally tells me. I'm not sure if that's really her final decision or if she's just saying something to get me to be quiet.

"alright. Just try to relax a little" I calmly say, still rubbing her shoulder. She's quiet and leans her head back on the pillow.

"it's getting late and you need some sleep.." I remind her, knowing she'd stay up all night if I didn't get her into bed.

"Mmk..." she says, yawning.

"how're you feelin?" I ask her.

"Fine..." she quietly says.

"you sure?" I ask, I don't want her to be hiding how she's really feeling if she's been getting sick.

"Yeah"

"just go lay down in bed and try to sleep.." I suggest, she really needs her rest

"Alright" she says, getting up and throwing the pillow back on the couch.

"do you want me to stay, or do you think you're gonna be okay?" I ask her, sometimes she doesn't really like to be alone.

"I'll be okay" she says, but it's more of a yawn.

"alright. Just get some rest, you need it" I tell her, getting up and squeezing her shoulder before I leave.

_Karen's POV_

We're on break so I decide to go talk to Ivy, she's been sitting by herself the whole rehearsal and she looks pretty bored. "What's up?"

"Just kinda bored...," she tells me, it looked that way, and I could tell she wanted to be dancing.

"Yeah. So Tom?" I ask, he's been hanging around her a lot and is taking care of her, I'm wondering if there's something I'm missing.

"What?"

"He's been watching you like a hawk for weeks" I tell her, everybody's noticed it.

"I know, he's been doing that ever since the time I fell..." she tells me, sounding a little annoyed.

"Is it cuz of the baby? Or is there something else I'm missing?" I ask, I'm pretty sure the man is gay, but I could be wrong. He's been taking care of her like he's the baby's father, or her boyfriend.

"It's the baby. He thinks I'm not eating enough and I'll hurt something dancing..." she replies.

"He cares. But I kinda think there's something more" I tell her, trying to get something, there's definitely something I'm missing, I just can't figure out what.

"Well I kinda like him... but he's gay," she tells me. HA, I knew it. She does like him, but is blowing it off because she knows, well thinks she knows he's gay.

"You never know... He might start liking you." I tell her, trying to get her to realize what it looks like to us when we see her with him.

"I don't think so... it's just my luck to start liking a gay guy. Anyways, I still work for him so it wouldn't be a good idea. Last time I tried that I was almost fired..." she says, which is true. Derek just had to be a jerk when she told him she was pregnant.

"Yeah. Just let him take care of you. He doesn't want you to do this alone" I tell her, it's good that somebody wants to help her, I know it's not easy to be alone and pregnant.

"I noticed..." she flatly says.

"It's kinda cute that he's doing this," I tell her, it is… they almost look like a couple sometimes, and I don't know if she sees that.

"You think?" she asks, looking at me like I'm crazy.

"Yeah. I do. He brings you food Ivy." I tell her, not just take out, he actually cooks for her.

"He keeps saying I don't eat enough" she says, which is true.

"Sometimes you don't Ivy." I reply, she really needs to make sure she gets enough to eat because of the baby.

"That's just what I'm used to" she says, most people that have a busy schedule usually pick up something on the go and their bodies just get used to it.

"I know but you can't do that now. It's a good thing Tom is looking out for you," I remind her. She doesn't say anything.

"I still think he likes you." I tell her, trying to get more out of her.

"Think what you want but I've worked with Tom before and it's been pretty clear he's gay" She replies, sounding annoyed.

"Yeah, okay... He could just be saying that"

"Why would he be doing that?" She asks.

"Not sure. I just can't stop thinking it's possible" I tell her, the thought just won't leave my head and I had to satisfy my curiosity.

"I'm still sure he's gay"

"Whatever you say..." I sigh, knowing she's not gonna admit to liking him.

"I'm pretty sure I've worked with him longer than you have" she argues.

"I believe you, but sometimes it makes me wonder" I tell her, she doesn't need the stress of an argument.

"If here were interested in me wouldn't he say something sooner?" she asks, which he probably would have but some guys don't say something right away.

"Probably. But I'm sure you just want to focus on the baby right now" I say, which might be true, and she might be wanting someone who can be there.

"You know I'm not keeping it..." she says, I already knew that.

"yeah, but you've still gotta keep yourself healthy" I remind her, even though she's letting someone adopt the baby, she needs to keep herself, and the baby healthy.

"That's what he keeps telling me..." she sighs.

"You know it's true Ivy." I say, I'm sure her doctor has talked to her about it.

"I know... I can't get used to people telling me what I should do" she says, sounding a little sad.

"It's different for you, I know. But just let somebody help for once" I say, I don't think I could handle being completely alone.

She sighs, "Alright..."

"As much as you hate it you've gotta relax." I tell her, I feel like she needs these extra reminders so she'll actually do something.

"I know... everyone tells me that" she says.

"Do you talk to Tom? Like about the big stuff?" I ask, trying to see how serious their friendship is.

"Not much..." she quietly says.

"Really?" I ask, a little shocked.

"Well I already talked to Julia about some of this..." she tells me, which makes since she's the one adopting the baby.

"That's good. I think things will work out" I tell her, when Derek calls us back together to work on the next number.

_Derek's POV_

We start working on another number and for some reason I don't realize until about halfway through that Ivy has stepped in and started dancing.

"IVY!" I yell, her doctor said she couldn't dance, and I can't believe she'd go against what her doctor said, regardless of how she felt.

"What?" she asks, when the pianist quits playing.

"I'm pretty sure your doctor said you couldn't dance." I remind her, great, I probably sound a little annoyed

"I don't remember hearing that..." she says, seriously? She wasn't listening to her doctor, she's officially crazy.

"well she did. You can't sneak in here and just dance like nothing is going on." I tell her, I think I remember hearing Tom say something about how she couldn't dance because they didn't want her to get hurt or something like that.

"You didn't even notice until halfway through the song," she says, which is true, I think I was paying more attention to Karen and how she was slightly off beat.

"That's my fault. You have to take it easy Ivy. I'm serious," I tell her, how did I miss it when she stepped into the number.

"We're already halfway through" she protests, trying to get me to let her stay in.

"I know that. Finish the number and then you're done." I sigh, reluctantly letting her stay in the number, that I'm not sure if Karen even knows. Ivy's doing a much better job and she's pregnant.

"Fine..." she sighs, starting to look really annoyed that I've stopped her.

"Just try to take it easy." I remind her, she obviously isn't used to slowing down.

"Alright" she sighs, and the piano starts up again. And I'm left still watching Karen, who's still struggling.

_Tom's POV_

I'm sitting at the table waiting for them to start History Is Made at Night when I see Ivy get up and walk over to Michael. This is not going to happen, I'm going to strap the woman to a chair if I have to so she doesn't dance. We don't want her getting hurt.

"Don't even think about it." I say, getting up and pulling her aside.

"Tom I haven't done anything in days..." she protests. I know she's bored but she just can't do this right now.

"Your doctor said you couldn't dance or do much acting." I remind her, yeah she can work on the songs when we're just using music stands or reading lines, but she can't do this.

She just sighs, maybe I can get her into another studio and we can work on some music so she's not sitting here doing nothing. "Just come sit for a while and then we can work on some of the music."

"Fine..." she pouts, but seems relieved that she can do something with the musical.

"You have to take it easy, I don't want you or the baby getting hurt" I remind her.

"I'm so bored..." she sighs.

"I know this is different but we just can't let you dance like that all day..." I try to explain, I want her to realize how important it is for her to rest and make sure everything's okay.

"Like I said when you have the baby you can work again." I remind her, I can definitely tell she's not too happy right now.

"Alright..." she sighs.

"It'll be fine. Just take it easy for right now" I remind her, yet again. She's not used to this and needs constant reminders, but I think she'll be fine.

_Derek's POV_

It's after rehearsal and Ivy comes up to me and looks extremely annoyed. Not too sure why though, I saw her talking to Tom and Karen today. "what's up?"

"It's your fault I lost the lead!" she exclaims, I really don't want to deal with this right now.

"well you're the one who wanted to sleep with me." I reply, she wanted me to come over, and things just happened from there. And it happened more than once so it's not like getting pregnant was out of the picture.

"You wanted to" she snaps, well, I did agree to sleeping with her. She looked so lonely when I was over, but now I think I regret it because I didn't want to have a kid.

"whatever I wasn't thinking about what could have happened." I tell her, I was just doing what she wanted, which meant sleeping with her.

"That's why it's your fault!" she yells, she's getting almost hysterical now and I really don't want to deal with her.

"I know I screwed up! But you said you'd do anything to get the lead." I yell, hopefully it'll make her feel better and stop screaming at me.

"I meant it!" she sighs, still sounding annoyed.

"you're lucky you're still here cuz if it weren't for Tom and Julia I would have fired you." I remind her, which is true, it really annoys me that Tom insisted on keeping her, it's just more money that we could be using to do other things for the show. She's quiet when I say this, crap. Probably something I shouldn't have said, I know I've told her more than once that I really don't want anything to do with this.

"seriously though, you need to take it easy." I say, hoping to make up for this or at least make her feel better. She's still quiet, great. I screwed up, again.

"if you do anything to hurt yourself now it'll be harder to get a lead later on" I remind her, trying to be a little nicer this time.

She just sighs, "fine" and storms off.

* * *

><p><strong>And that's the chapter! So, we're doing more of this in other people's POV right now since I've been reading and everyone's really liking seeing this in Derek's POV to see how he thinks, and other people are really liking Tom's since it has the TomIvy friendship going on. **

**Also, the reviews! Please, keep it up! The input is really helpful and I liking knowing what my readers think, so thanks.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Well it took forever but finally, here it is. Ambition chapter 7 :)**

* * *

><p><em>Derek's POV<em>

The next morning, we're working on Let Me Be Your Star and Ivy's voice is cracking, she's starting to sound like that damn Disney mouse since she's trying to push through it but she's squeaking. It's getting so annoying I can hardly listen to this anymore, "IVY, STOP" I yell at her.

"what?" she asks, but it's more of a squeak. God, she even looks like that mouse, she's got on red today.

"do you not hear your voice cracking?" I ask her.

"I'm just trying to push through that…" she mumbles.

"it's making everybody else sound ridiculous" I tell her, it's just annoying.

"ridiculous?" she shrieks. Her voice really cracked that time, she better not lose it completely.

"yeah Ivy, ridiculous. You're starting to sound like that damn mouse" I really don't like Disney, I don't see the point, that Minnie Mouse thing or whatever it's called annoys me.

"THIS is ridiculous! How does anyone put up with being directed by you?" she asks, well croaks.

"just do as I say, the last thing I need is that voice going completely" I yell, knowing I get full power over this argument if her voice goes out.

"this is stupid…" she mumbles.

"it's still cracking Ivy, why the HELL is your voice cracking?" I yell at her, there better not be something seriously wrong with her voice, or else she can't be Marilyn, well we've already crossed that bridge, she's pregnant, and Marilyn can't be pregnant.

"I DON'T KNOW" she squeaks, obviously trying to scream. And I can't decide if it's hilarious or annoying at this point.

"you sound like a mouse. I'm gonna need Cartwright in here if your voice doesn't quit that" I exclaim, Karen's head shoots up at the mention of her name, at least someone is paying attention here.

She opens her mouth to try to protest but all that comes out is a squeak. And it's ridiculous. She gasps and looks to Tom to help her. I can't help but laugh, "damn it, do something about that voice" I snap.

Before she can protest again the stage manager calls for a ten minute break. She tries to run out of the room but Tom stops her.

_Tom's POV_

I stop Ivy from running away and give her shoulder a gentle squeeze, "what's going on?"

"I don't know…" she tries to say, but it sounds like a strained squeak.

"do you want me to call your doctor?" I ask, she opens her mouth to reply, but I stop her, "don't talk, just nod"

She hesitantly nods, I know she's not a big fan of doctors, but we need to get this checked out. "alright, is your throat bothering you?" I ask, she could have a sore throat and not be telling any of us.

She just shrugs, and I get her a cup of water from the bottle in the corner. "drink all of this, and I'm gonna see how soon we can get you in to your doctor"

She starts to sip the water and gives me a small smile. I call her doctors office after she gives me the number, and I'm lucky enough to get her in today, they squeezed her in this afternoon.

I smile at Ivy, who looks annoyed. "she's got an opening in an hour, I'll take you so you don't have to strain your voice"

She glares at me, and I smile "it's probably just stress, but we really should get this checked out"

She just continues to glare at me as I go to let Julia know I'm taking Ivy to the doctor. I walk back over to Ivy and the cab ride to the office is silent, well partially because of her voice, and she's probably mad at me.

She signs herself in and sits by me, still glaring at me, and pouting. I gently squeeze her shoulder, "relax, you'll be fine"

She just continues to pout but her glare goes away as we wait on the woman. A tall redheaded nurse calls her name about fifteen minutes later and she hesitantly gets up and follows the woman as they check her height, weight and temperature. This is when I realize it's been a while since she's been to the doctor, yeah, she's gone for the baby, but just not for a checkup or anything else.

They get her into an exam room and the nurse takes her blood pressure, "try to relax Ivy, it's a little high"

Ivy sighs and glares at me. I get up and start to rub her back, "don't worry, just take some deep breaths" the nurse smiles and Ivy tries to take a few breaths.

She checks her blood pressure again and smiles, "that's better… just try to relax and your doctor will be in soon"

Ivy tenses up as the door closes and glares at me. She hasn't really said a word since we've been here, and I can tell she just hates it. About ten minutes later there's a knock, and Ivy tries to tell the woman to come in.

She smiles at Ivy, "what's been going on?"

Ivy tries to explain to the woman that her voice has been cracking but it comes out as little squeaks. I squeeze Ivy's shoulder and explain the situation to the woman who nods and smiles at ivy.

The doctor starts to examine Ivy, and she just sits there and lets the woman do what she needs to. "has your throat been sore?"

Ivy just shrugs and shakes her head, still not saying anything. The doctor smiles as she grabs a tongue depressor and her light. I notice Ivy's hand reaching for mine so I take it and rub small circles on the top of her hand. Ivy hesitantly opens her mouth and squeezes my hand tight while the doctor is looking at her throat.

A couple seconds later she takes the tongue depressor out and smiles, "it's just a little red, nothing seems swollen and this is most likely something some rest and maybe a little prednisone would clear up"

Ivy looks at me when she mentions the medicine, almost begging for it. But I'm worried about how it's going to affect her and the baby.

"Ivy, I think you'll be fine without the medicine, just rest for a few days" I suggest.

She pouts, "b…ut" I try so hard not to laugh when she tries to talk, she's really hoarse and I know she's trying to push it.

"I'll write you a prescription, but nothing's swollen, or infected, but if things don't get any better in a day or two, then you can take some. Just rest and make sure you drink enough fluids" the woman smiles, writing the information for her medicine on a slip of paper.

Ivy smiles and takes the slip giving me a look that actually isn't a glare for once. When the doctor leaves I suggest getting her some Italian ice to help soothe her throat and she agrees without any hesitation. I take the prescription slip from her, so I can hold on to it unless she needs it, since we really have to think about the baby and what could happen if she takes this.


End file.
